


Heavy

by yxmtm



Category: Messiah Project - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, it's so short hahaaaa....., mentions of haruto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-13
Updated: 2015-07-13
Packaged: 2018-04-08 23:16:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4324554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yxmtm/pseuds/yxmtm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He lost his brother, and now he's losing his best friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Heavy

Heavy. 

He felt so heavy.

Like the one time they went to the sea and their clothes stuck to their skin, dragging them down, making it so hard to walk. And yet they laughed, the three of them. They were so happy that day. But he should've known better, nothing good ever stays in his life, he thinks. 

He lost his brother, and now he's losing his best friend.

He sits beside Mamoru, listening carefully to the heart monitor, as if making sure he's still alive. He wont admit it, but every beep sounds like hope, and that's the last thing he wants to be — hopeful, because that's what he was when Haruto washed away. 

He was hopeful that they might have found him; hopeful that he might still be alive; hopeful that the three of them might smile together again.

He tries to focus. He closes his eyes but all he can see is Mamoru and the bullet that was meant to be his. He replays it in his head like some kind of code he can't crack.

He still remembers how it felt seeing Mamoru fall and not get up.

It felt heavy.

As if everything he has rebuilt up to this point dissolved suddenly into the realisation that he might lose him.

And yet the heart monitor beeps steadily. He is trying to be strong, but tears crept slowly in his eyes and down to his face. He's holding the hand of the person who used to wipe his tears, and it's cold. 

 

He's tired. Mamoru must be too.

Kaito's been selfish. He's been too stubborn. He's been too hard to understand. And yet Mamoru never gave up on him.

He doesn't want to give up either, but Mamoru must be so tired.

Kaito feels so heavy, but he stands. He stares down at him, tracing the curves on Mamoru's face and embedding it in his mind so he does not forget. 

He doesn't want to say farewell, but he opens his mouth. 

"I'll eat my vegetables" he whispers

"Mamoru, I love you."

And then the beeping stops.

**Author's Note:**

> im a bit hesitant to post this because i wasnt sure where it was going, but i just kept writing. this is the product of a sleep-deprived me at 1am after re-watching the shibi no shou senshuuraku. it's my first in a while, but i actually posted this one! if there are any mistakes, please dont be afraid to correct me!! i appreciate all kinds of comments ♥♥ thank you for reading;;


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